On total trust and being on the other side of the camera | Angelsea Urban

It was on my list of 101 things to do in 1001 days. Get my OWN photographs taken. Of ME. Egads….who wants to get their picture taken? Oh yeah…clients…who trust ME to take theirs. If I was going to ask my clients to trust ME then I had to trust someone else. I needed to put myself in my clients point of view so I could really learn how to serve them the very best way. To fully understand what it feels like. From the expectations of the results to the experience itself.

Which brings me to pivotal point – WHO – should I choose to take my photos? How do you choose a photographer? If you know someone whose work you have seen and you have a friend with a raving review from a past experience with them, then it’s easy. But what if you don’t…then where do you start?

I needed head-shots (or at least that’s what I thought I’d get – insert loving snicker towards Alicia here)  or promotional photos for use on my website, blog and other media and publications. Cell phone selfies just wouldn’t do.

I first looked around at the people whose work I admired. There were a sea of “portrait” photographers; a narrower lake of “headshot” photographers, and then finally a very small pond of “beauty” photographers.  Let’s NOT confuse this with modern day “Glamor Shots” from your local shopping mall circa 1990. But someone who specialized in capturing the inner beauty of an individual. THAT took trust. To be that vulnerable and allow someone to examine ME and look at ME and draw out the inner beauty they saw in ME. I shudder just thinking about being exposed on that level. Not because of the outside results, but by allowing her to bring the inside out.

I chose Alicia Candelora of No Eye Has Seen Photography. Alicia and I are close friends. You can see her surprise NYC wedding proposal here and I cannot WAIT to attend her upcoming wedding! And because we are close friends I knew I could trust HER to do that for me (or at least I thought I did….insert another snicker here…HA!) Lucky for me, I was headed up to Connecticut to visit family for the weekend so the timing was perfect and she was able to squeeze me in her VERY busy schedule (see….because LOTS of people trust her in this way). We planned the shoot on a Friday evening following a full make up session by the incredibly talented Erin Infantino. Yes, a full make up session – it was my very first professional make over – ever. And Erin was super sweet and gentle and did her thing and I didn’t see a peek until she was totally finished. I now had to totally trust HER and her craft and her vision and her expertise. I sat down and she just did her thing. Examining me and looking at me and pulling out her very best version of me. (Insert bright red embarrassed face here.) But Erin is an expert in her field and the results were amazing. WHO was THIS girl? HA!

Side note: I may absolute insist that every women I photograph from now on have a professional do their makeup before every photoshoot. Capturing your inner beauty is not trying to LOOK your absolute best, but to FEEL your absolute best. Because it will absolutely show in your photographs. Having your hair and make up done professionally for a photoshoot will help you build confidence and allow you to drop that fear of “what if I don’t look good”.

 

Now, fear may pop up in other areas of your shoot. Like when your close photographer friend who you trusted to photograph your “inner beauty” in a HEADSHOT spontaneously decides that the light is perfect and the hair and make up looks great and that somehow equals a different kind of photography moment. HA! Maybe she broke my trust for a moment, but that’s only because she is an expert in HER craft and she knew better than I did and pushed me past my comfort zone to allow her to capture me in a way I would never have allowed otherwise. Steve sure is thankful though. 😉 

 

Alicia posed me and directed me. As a client, I’m guessing I was one of her worst. Staring down the barrel of a camera suddenly felt like a firing squad. A giant softbox blaring at me and I was suddenly VERY aware that I was being photographed. (insert that super scared emoji here)

Here’s an example:

Alicia: “Ok, so sit here, and with your head tilt it here (gesturing) and then angle your chin down and bring your eyes towards me”

Me: (hearing a Charlie Brown voice) (waaa..waaa…waaa..waaaa) “I’m sorry, what?”

Alicia: “Ok, so bring your eyes towards me, and angle your back like this (demonstrating)”

Me: “Um…..(falling) like this?” lol

Oh I was so so lost. And we laughed. A lot. So much that my attempt at “professional” looking photo session ended up in a giggle fest. Each time she positioned me and I tried to be serious and exhale holding the “serious” pose –  she would make me laugh. And THEN she would take the picture – and I was HORRIFIED. And then I laughed again – because I realized I do the SAME EXACT THING to MY clients.  That in the end it’s never the photo they *think* they want, but I one just *after* that. Because that is the authentic one. The real one. I just didn’t know that it might actually FEEL horrifying. Like I wasn’t supposed to laugh just then. Silly me….REALLY?!  When are we NOT supposed to laugh? Ever?  Especially when trying to capture authentic moments? Really? I wanted her to capture ME, and I actually do laugh. A LOT. And as a photographer, this experience has taught me SO SO much.

 

 

In the end we got past most of my awkwardness and Alicia managed to do the thing she does best, despite my awkward client challenges. And because we are photographers, we never pass up a chance to practice and try new things. So after my “real” pictures were done, we grabbed Steve on fabric duty and Adam on wind duty and had some fun. Alicia’s vision for “fun” turned out to be a beautiful photograph that just so happens to have ME in it.

And if you’ve managed to get this far, here are some… “others”

Photography by: Alicia Candelora of No Eye Has Seen Photography
Make up by: Erin Infantino of Simply Gorgeous